New Openings:
1) I was supposed to turn 18 six months ago but got that taken away but a cross fire. Ever since I've been watching my family and friends from this view from above and realized that I need to be there.
2) "Where am I? What is this place? What happened? Is this heaven?" I mumbled.
I knew this couldn't be right, I couldn't be dead. Then I remebered the gun shot and someone screaming my name.
3) You find out a lot about your family and friends and what they thought about you when you're dead.
4) Life is delicate object and can be broken easily. Well, I broke my life but luckily I got a 2nd chance.
5) Hi, my name is Riley and I've been dead for six months.
~Jam
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5 comments:
I like both the first and second ones. They both go really well with your story. The first one kinda explains more what the story might be about. but the second one was more fun and interesting. Both would keep me reading on
I really like the last one because it gives a sense of heaven. And the idea of death. Also what happend to this girl. Good Job.
I agree with megan. I really liked the first and second hooks. I think the second one seems more chaotic and it made me want to read more.
My favorite would be number 4 because it is very interesting and keeps the reader wanting more.
I love.
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